Baboon Pirates

Scribbles and Scrawls from an unrepentant swashbuckling primate.

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Location: Texas, United States

Monday, September 22, 2008

An Even MORE Tasteless Post!

Some Days I Can't Chase My Readers Away Fast Enough!

Post-Hurricane Ike, the news media is still riding the adrenaline high, and doing what they can to keep the ratings rolling in.

One story that refuses to die is the "government coverup" aimed at keeping the media from seeing the acres of dead floating bodies that surely must be littering the beaches and bayous.

No piles of corpses have been spotted so far, but those who claim to be in the know are insisting that they likely suffered sufficient trauma to sink to the bottom of Galveston Bay rather than float out the Ship Channel.

Likely we'll see a 'CSI: Miami' episode before too long exposing what really happens to storm-battered bodies.

Still, just to be on the safe side, I am NOT eating any crab fished out of the Gulf for the next couple of years. It'd be just my luck to crack one open and find someone's wedding ring...

As long as we're all here, I might as well repost my Gratuitous Cajun Crab Joke: (Originally told to me by Rockhauler)
Marie Laveaux gets worried when her husband Thibodeaux Laveaux decides to geaux out fishing in his pirogue. He always carries a cooler full of beer (Thibodeaux, he likes the Streauxs beer, him), and gets likkered up out in the bayeaux. Sometimes, he even snorts a little bleaux, and tries to wrestle them there alligators. Marie just kneauxs that Thibodeaux is gonna get too blotteaux on one of these trips, and drown out in the swamps, floating down the bayeaux, his eyes pecked out by creauxs.

One night, Thibodeaux Laveaux doesn't return from the bayeaux. "Oh, neaux!" says Marie.

In the morning, she calls up her cousin Boudreaux, the parish sheriff. "Cher Boudreaux" says Marie Laveaux. You gots to geaux out to the bayeaux and find Thibodeaux! He ain't returned from his fishing trip in his pirogue. Oh, weaux is me!"

Boudreaux is kinda sleaux, but agrees to geaux look for Thibodeaux. He gets his deputies Fonteneaux and Longfelleaux in a pirogue, and off they reaux.

Later that evening, Boudreaux knocks on the Laveaux's door. "Marie, I got the good news, and I got the bad news. Which one you want first, cher?"

Marie is so nervous, she wants to threaux up. "Geaux ahead and give me the bad news, Boudreaux."

"Cher," says Boudreaux, "We done found ol' Thibodeaux floatin' on the bayeaux. He been pecked by creaux, and was just covered in the blue crabs."

Marie was laid leaux. Who now would squire her to the fais do-do? Who would bring in the deaux?

"What's the good news, Boudreaux?"

"Well," says Boudreaux, "We gonna float him out again tonight, and you get half de crab!"

And now, away I will geaux, before you all find something to threaux at me.