Baboon Pirates

Scribbles and Scrawls from an unrepentant swashbuckling primate.

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Location: Texas, United States

Friday, November 25, 2011

Blackhead Friday

The Horror... The Horror...

OK, I told myself I wasn't going to enter a single retail establishment today.

Sigh. I was weak.

The three hours spent in a big leather wingback chair smoking cigars & watching football at the local ManCave went OK. They do sell the cigars, so it does qualify as retail. The proprietor waved me to the chair saying "Pay later! $CollegeTeam is about to score. I don't wanna get up right now!" It's the kind of casual treatment I can respect! I guess it emboldened me to poke my head in another store.

Bad, bad move...

I've been looking for a couple of obscure DVDs, and (oxymoron alert) a new used DVD store opened on the far west side. So, I thought I'd poke around.

Little did I know I wouldn't be the only one poking.

After browsing the aisles, I found a few keepers and went to go get in line. It wasn't real busy, but there was a couple in front of me.

As the clerkatron pulled their DVDs from the storage drawers, the female turned to face her boyfriend, and that's when the nightmare began.

Y'know, it's nice to know people have loving relationships, and that the care you have for your mate allows you to do all sorts of things for them.

Popping their facial zits as you stand in line SHOULD NOT BE ONE OF THOSE THINGS!!!

I was aghast as she applied thumbnails to his face, squeezing zits like she was popping bubble wrap. The dude didn't even try to escape! I figured for sure this was the moral equivalent of your mom reaching for your face with a spit-dampened Kleenex! You have a genetic imperative to back away!!

Making matters worse, when the clerkatron rang up their total, she didn't even wipe her hands clean! She pulled out some bills and handed them over. I was gonna pay cash, but whipped out a credit card rather than chance getting change smeared with zit juice!!

Awful, awful, awful...

Please, y'all! No zit popping in public! Do it (OK, don't do it) for the cheeeeldrun!!!!