Baboon Pirates

Scribbles and Scrawls from an unrepentant swashbuckling primate.

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Location: Texas, United States

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Guns That Hurt On Both Ends

I Should Be On Vacation This Week...

I got to thinking about how stout a reload I'd be willing to put through the Ruger Redhawk before I p#ssy out, pulling off the wood grips and putting some Hogue SquishyGrips on it.

I've got a Hogue Monogrip on the Blackhawk, and it tones down the .357 bark to a mere whimper. I also had a Monogrip on the Speed Six, and while it works like a charm, the rubber snags a bit on fabric, and adds considerably to the bulk, so I put the hardwood grips back on. I'll just have to let it sting when I run the 158 grain boomers through it.

That line of thought led me to list the guns I'd just as soon never shoot again, based on their ability to inflict pain on the user as well as the target.

#1 is the Smith & Wesson Model 13 in .357 Magnum. Essentially the same size as my Ruger Speed Six, this revolver has some odd quirk of ergonomics in that each round felt akin to a ball peen hammer being smacked into the bones of my palm. The Pachmayr grip actually made it worse than the stock wood grips would have been. (I'm of the opinion that Pachmayr grips are a cruel joke foisted on the shooting crowd)

The Model 13 is a stainless steel bull-barreled gun, so at least there's some weight there. An alloy or Scandium frame would be even worse...

#2 is the Yugoslav M48 (Mauser clone) with the steel "Skull-crusher" buttplate. Designed to poke deep wedges in Slavic craniums, the buttplate also does a doozy on your shoulder when firing full-power military ammo. It's a bolt action, so there's nothing to slow down the recoil other than the soft tissues of your shoulder. I've been known to take a range sandbag and stuff it between the rifle & my shoulder.

#3 - Rifle #5 Mk 1 (aka Jungle Carbine) - A chopped and lightened Lee Enfield, the Jungle Carbine also comes equipped with a log-splitting wedge cleverly disguised as a rubber recoil pad. In addition to the shoulder trauma received, you'll miss your target due to the inherent "wandering zero" problem endemic to the carbine.

#4 - H&R "Topper" shotgun & clones - A light single-shot 12 gauge, this has just enough weight to it so that you think you won't fracture your collarbone. This is not the case. It's OK with birdshot, but a round of buck will make you cry...

#5 - Any T/C Contender or other single-shot rifle/pistol in a rifle caliber larger than .223 - Look, it's a stunt, OK? Just admit it! You can just as easily carry a rifle wherever you need to blast prairie dogs! Shooting .416 Rigby out of a 4 pound pistol is just nucking futs.

Here's a trio I wouldn't try on a dare.

#1 - This is a Stoeger double, similar to my 12 gauge coach gun. I recognize the triggers and forend latch. Unlike mine, someone has sawn off the stock & barrels, leaving about a foot of barrel. Better get two hands on it, this one's gonna jump...

#2 - The Zombie Special. Remember the M48 from above? This is the same model, kitted out with a 10 round mag, shorty barrel and muzzle brake. You're gonna need that brake. You could light up the Astrodome with the muzzle flash. Enjoy that buttplate separating your arm bones.

#3 - Russian Mosin-Nagant Insanity. The 7.62 x 54R cartridge is a firebreather out of a carbine barrel. I can't even imagine how violent the flash & bang will be out of this abomination. Good luck working that bolt! Without the stock for leverage, you might end up using a come-along hooked to a truck bumper to pry that bolt lever up.