Baboon Pirates

Scribbles and Scrawls from an unrepentant swashbuckling primate.

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Location: Texas, United States

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

I Knew This Would Happen...

Wanted: Intravenous Drip For Bourbon

Late night at the office, plowing through the chaos and confusion of departmental layoff plans in a vain effort to get things squared away before the 17th.

I guess it's a mixed blessing. The fact that these plans are so jacked up is not really indicative of the incompetence of the departments (though that likely plays a role), but the fact that layoffs are such a rare thing that no one knows how to do the plans properly.

Still, the entire procedure is spelled out in detail in The Man's rulebook. In short, sort into two tiers, management & peons. Manager tier get sorted by annual review score. Peon tier gets sorted into 4 levels, based on FT/PT/Temp status, hire date, & annual review score. If anyone's got irreplaceable skills, you write an exemption letter, then the person following them on the list gets the axe.

The plans submitted so far are rarely complete. Most are flawed in ways ranging from the humorous to the tragic.

Took my first really hard punch to the gut when I read a couple of names this afternoon. One of the public outreach offices of The Man is about to be cut in half, and they were swamped with work already. I've worked hand-in-glove with the people in this office since I've been with The Man, and all of them are the antithesis of the 'lazy government employee'.

Making matters worse, I've got a meeting with them Thursday afternoon, knowing that 2 out of 4 have their walking papers moving through the system.

No word yet on my department. As I said earlier, they're saving us until last...