Baboon Pirates

Scribbles and Scrawls from an unrepentant swashbuckling primate.

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Location: Texas, United States

Wednesday, May 24, 2017

Ice Cream Machine's Broken Again...

Life's Harsh. Buy A Helmet.

Not being a regular at the Golden Arches, I became aware via the Interwebs that Mickey D's has a bit of an issue with their ice cream.

Seems that instead of going through the daily hassle of cleaning/servicing/refilling the soft-serve machine, it's much easier for the $15-an-hour-seeking drones to just claim "Duh Mosheen Be Broke" and avoid the work.

Funny that I'd have something in common with Ol' Ronald.  The free ice cream dispenser around here has been phuct for some time.

My occasional screeds over on BookFace aren't nearly as fun.  Quite a few of the folks in my feed don't seem to be able to digest more than a dozen words or so before scrolling to the next item.  I'm pretty sure that instead of seeing my Wall-Of-Text clogging their iPhone, I've been consigned to the "Hidden from feed" purgatory.

So, I spew over here from time to time.  Shame it's not the two scoops with some whipped topping every day or so, but that's life in the big city.  Roll with the changes, y'all...

Tuesday, May 23, 2017

Another Asploding Asshole - Manchester Edition

Was The ID Of The Bomber Ever Really In Doubt?




Tuesday, April 25, 2017

More Random Amusements

Still Trying To Pretend This Blog Is Alive...






Monday, April 03, 2017

What's Good For The Gander...

Suck It Up, Mother Goose!

I looked it up on Google.  It's for real.  Bloody Hell...

(Click Pic To Embiggenate!)


Tuesday, March 21, 2017

To Spank Is Human...

To Forgive, Divine.

Gotta rant for a bit.

One of my college friends posted a Spank The Kids/Don't Spank The Kids question on the Book of Face.  Got a pretty even mix of answers.

Full Disclosure:  I don't have kids, don't plan to, but my answer was a definite "Beat 'em like a rented mule!"

My ass got wore out more than a few times, but very rarely for the same offense.   Mom & Dad were also pretty straight up about it being punishment, and not something done out of anger.

In short, I don't think I suffered as a result.  I've got precisely zero run-ins with the law due to violence issues.

Anyway, an old family friend popped in out of nowhere on the post and commented that spanking was never appropriate, that kids should go to time-out, or have privileges taken away, etc.

I was dumbfounded.  The commenter, who I'll call "Uncle Fred" had met my parents years before I came along, and he and "Aunt Wilma" were a constant fixture in our lives.  Their second child "Barney" was born two weeks after me, and we spent the next 8 years swapping diapers, toys and assorted childhood infections.

See, my memory of "Uncle Fred" is at odds with his statement.  While I never saw him actually spank "Barney", he could unsling his leather belt faster than John Wayne could skin a sixshooter.  "Barney's" reaction to the leather snaking out, getting doubled over and popped was to shriek and head for the hills.  Clearly he had some passing familiarity with "Uncle Fred's" fashion accessory.

I really, really wanted to call "Uncle Fred" out, but I suppose he could have mellowed in his advancing years.  There's also a big difference between spanking kids and spanking grandkids, which he's got a lot of.

OK, rant over.

Friday, March 10, 2017

Nike Is Greek, Not Arabic...

ZOMG!  An Actual Post!!

Saw this elsewhere on the web.  I know it's got some folks all discombobulated...

I don't have a beef with Nike over their peddling of a "sports burqa".  They're in the sports-gear selling business, and if there's a demand for this sort of thing, more power to 'em for being the supply.

Can't say I'm a big fan of the idea of the burqa, but I don't think you can claim Nike is subjugating women or promoting Islamic patriarchy.  Whoever's inclined to buy one of these is already wearing a burqa, most likely.

Who knows, Nike may even expand their options.  Look for a Catholic Nun sports wimple.  The Mennonites or Hutterites or Vermiculites that have their young women wear bonnets will need a version, too.

Friday, March 03, 2017

Just for Heath J

'Cause Too Much Maddow Is Bad For the Soul...