First, Let's Kill All The Lawyers

Another Fun Afternoon

As an appetizer, my favorite lawyer joke!

Q: Why do lawyers wear neckties?

A: It keeps the foreskins from sliding up over their faces!

I've about had it with our resident barracudas. Day #2 spent preparing for a deposition that's still over a month away. Today's barracuda specialized in "Gotcha!" questions, asking you random things until you said something actionable, at which point they'd freak out and scream about how much money you're going to cost The Man.

I understand why they're doing it. Better to get a little bloody with a tame lawyer instead of getting bled dry by the opposite side. Still, it's left me with the certain knowledge that there's a significant percentage of the population that's getting rich off of obfuscation and hair-splitting.

I thought I could remain in this position for another year or so, building up my contacts before moving upward in whatever direction available. I dunno about that now. I'm not happy having to open up my files and methods of operation and have them pawed through by these pestilential pricks. Oh, I'll still be subject to a certain amount of scrutiny no matter where I go, but putting a little distance between The Man and myself would take a good deal of heat off.

Damn, wish we still ran the zoo. No one ever sues the guy who orders the moose chow and hay bales.