The Bigger They Are...

Help! I've Fallen & I Can't Get Up!

Well, that sucked.

In the process of hauling a gigantimous trash bag full of torn-up drywall & old carpet out to the street for heavy trash pickup, I managed to get my feets tangled up in a combination of drooping pant leg, yew bush, and the sidewalk edge.

The result? El Cap floundering around horizontally on the front porch, halfway in the shrubbery, and looking for all the world like a manatee washed ashore in a mangrove swamp.

I'd be a lot more bruised up, but there was a small wooden table next to the front door that delayed my final impact. I fear it'll never be the same again.

As I'm trying to pull my carcass upright, I was struck by the thought that maybe I ought to fall over more often. The extra practice at getting up off the ground might come in handy. It occurs to me that I'm either sitting, standing or on a bed or couch virtually 100% of the time. I hardly ever get down on my knees unless something really expensive and/or irreplaceable has rolled underneath something.

I fear this will leave a sizeable bruise...