Baboon Pirates

Scribbles and Scrawls from an unrepentant swashbuckling primate.

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Location: Texas, United States

Friday, July 21, 2006

Cannibal Jokes

Can't Let Things Get Too Serious!

Q: Why don't cannibals ever eat clowns?
A: They taste funny.

A cannibal walks into the clearing his tribe uses for a toilet. He sees his best friend having a shit and crying his eyes out.
"What's wrong with you?" he asks.
His pal looks up at him with watery eyes and says: "I've just dumped my girlfriend..."

Two cannibals, Edgar and Bob, meet one day. Edgar said, "You know, I just can't seem to get a tender missionary. I've baked them, I've roasted them, stewed them, I've barbecued them, I've tried every sort of marinade. Just can't seem to get them tender."
Bob asked, "What kind of missionary do you use?"
"Oh, you know, said Edgar. "The ones that hang out at that place at the bend in the river. They have those brown cloaks with a rope around the waist and they're sort of bald on top with a funny ring of hair on their heads."
"Aha!" Bob exclaimed, "No wonder! Those are fryers!"

Q: What did the cannibal get when he was late for dinner?
A: The cold shoulder.

Q: What do cannibals do at a wedding?
A: They toast the bride and groom.

A man gets captured by cannibals and every day they poke him with spears and use his blood to wash down their food. Finally the guy calls the chief over and says, "You can kill me or you can eat me, but I'm tired of getting stuck for drinks."

These two cannibals kill a missionary. They argue for a while about how to divide him up, when finally, one of them says, "Okay. You start at the head and I'll start at the feet."
So they begin their tasty feast. After a while one of them says, "Hey, this is really great. I'm having a ball."
"Slow down!" cries the other cannibal "You're eating too fast!"