Baboon Pirates

Scribbles and Scrawls from an unrepentant swashbuckling primate.

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Location: Texas, United States

Monday, May 05, 2008

Torches & Pitchforks

Belittle A Childhood Icon At Your Peril...

Wow. That was exciting.

I got several firmly worded yet polite comments on last Thursday's post that accused Mr. Rogers of Advanced Wussification, and a couple of blistering emails that propriety prohibits me from reproducing in a public forum.

The message from all was remarkably similar. Fred Rogers was a Saint, and I suck scrofulous donkey balls for implying otherwise.

Sadly, I got no links from infuriated (or appreciative) bloggers over the matter, which was the whole point of the exercise.

See, I've been languishing for a while in the blog doldrums. I was looking for something, ANYTHING to drum up some traffic, or at least cause a stir. The "TV Wuss" post had been percolating for a while, but I just couldn't find the right hook to use.

For those who feel Mr. Rogers doesn't belong on the list, you are wiser than you realize. He actually didn't make the original cut, or the next two revisions. Dick Van Patten (The dad on 'Eight Is Enough'), Michael Gross (The dad on 'Family Ties') and Johnny Crawford (the snot-nosed, mewling pissant kid Mark McCain on 'The Rifleman') were originally the placeholders for that slot.

As I edited photos and rewrote copy, I kept thinking I could do a better list. And as they say, if I couldn't dazzle with brilliance, I could always baffle with bullshit. There just wasn't enough punch to it. Not enough emotional impact. I mean, who's going to go to bat for Meathead Stivic or Phil Donahue?

No, I needed an almost universally loved figure to fan some flames.

Captain Kangaroo I considered only briefly. I liked the show too much, and besides, who needs Mr. Moose showing up and showering you with ping pong balls for revenge? I'd never get that crap all picked up...

Next on the Rotiss-o-Mat was Bill Cosby. Again, I couldn't do it. I spent too much time as a kid singing "Na, Na Naaaah, gonna have a good time! HEY HEY HEY!" with the Cosby kids. And I still miss Jello Pudding Pops.

That left Mahatma Gandhi and Mr. Rogers. And Gandhi didn't have a TV show...

So, there's the whole story. If you're looking for a moral to the tale, I guess "Don't troll your own blog" works as well as any. I won't be editing the list, but at least now you know the whys and wherefores.

And yes, Erica, we're still friends!