Baboon Pirates

Scribbles and Scrawls from an unrepentant swashbuckling primate.

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Location: Texas, United States

Sunday, May 08, 2005

New Blog Showcase!!

The Baboon Pirates Edition, Full Of Buccaneer Primate Goodness!

If I'm counting the editions correctly, this is the 11th New Blog Showcase. Unfortunately, we didn't even get 11 participant submissions via the regular channels. I'm thinking we need some advertising from one of the giganto-bloggers to kickstart this thing, but I can't afford the kind of coin it would take just to top the Puppy Blender's regular ad revenue.

On that note, I wonder when the first blogger Payola scandal's gonna hit?

Well, ya gotta go with whatcha got, so here's this week's edition. I've supplemented the sparse submissions with a few blogs I found, and I've interspersed the entries with some advice for the newbies. Not that I'm that far from newbie-ness myself!

Nomen Est Omen
S. Faolán Wolf brings us a brand spankin' new blog, Nomen Est Omen. While Faolán claims membership in the Shitty Blog Club, it's actually not bad at all. Faolán pursues a subject near & dear to my heart by cursing out the idjits who allow their kids to grow up unattended and feral as wild hogs. They probably smell like little hogs, too. The post is called "Dear Downstairs Neighbors". Go give it a read!
New Blogger Hint #1: Try looking at your blog using a browser different from your usual choice. Your blog may look all kinds of spiffy in IE, but may be a pile of gibberish in Opera or Firefox.

Health Business Blog
David Williams brings us the Health Business Blog, a well-written and medical business oriented blog. In other words, it's worlds apart from the usual vulgar blogs I'm reading!

He's got a good report on the Single Payer Healthcare System up in Montreal. Opponents of socialized medicine might want to give it a look-see.
New Blogger Hint #2: Watch the order that your sidebar items load. Often your little bells & whistles depend on a remote server, and if that server's down or lagging, your blog hangs on loading. Most readers won't wait more than 10 or 15 seconds for your page to load. If they get a blank screen and a spinning hourglass, they're outta there, and you've lost a potential reader. Consider moving all non-local items lower on your page, or redo your code so your sidebar loads after your main section loads.

Sapphire Soul
My buddy Zippo was wowed by the artwork and the first post on this site. He's now lurking here every day, probably drooling over his Parrothead tee shirt. I can't say that I blame him! It's a great looking site, though I do have to move off of Safari and into IE to see it correctly. (See Hint #1!)
Here's the post Zippo thought worthy of consideration.

New Blogger Hint #3: Embedding funky loud music, fart noises, screechy hollering animals, or the moan-track from p()rn films into your blog *REALLY* PO's the people accessing your blog from work.
Elyas Bakhtiari brings us, a left-leaning blog, but one that's well-written and funny, unlike most of the humorless lefty blogs out there! The Official Bush Press Conference Drinking Game is an absolute riot, but that's not the one he wanted to submit.
His submitted post concerns a topic both Cons & Libs can agree on in principle, the eradication of smallpox. It's worth your time, so go check it out!
New Blogger Hint #4: Not everyone's on broadband yet, Speedy McLAN. You want universal access for the greatest amount of readers. Bogging down your site in Java and Flash might look good to your dorm-mates, but the umpteen million poor schlubs still on dialup just hit their 'BACK' key after waiting for your page to load.

Atlas Shrugs
Pamela at Atlas Shrugs almost got a full write-up in this week's New Blog Showcase. Unfortunately, hers is not a new blog, and I'm a rules-followin' kind of guy, at least regarding something given into my care. Pamela, the next hint's for you! (Due to extreme hotness and political leanings, I couldn't axe her submission completely...)

New Blogger Hint #5: Before submitting posts to Carnivals, make sure you're aware of the ground rules, and the general tone of the Carnival.

Common Folk Using Common Sense
Shamalama is a "stoothearted lad" bringing you the perils of the eeevil Phil A. Buster. He's a groosh Scottish bairn, so go check out his blog, lest ye be laid aboot th' heid & shoulders wi' truncheon stout!

New Blogger Hint #6: Please use a color scheme that doesn't induce epileptic fits, or those that remind one of diaper-changing time. Thanks.

Techno Freek
Techno Freek at his eponymous blog wishes to introduce you to Apple's new OS named Tiger, but he's got a rather aged blog as well. Bad Freek! No Cookie! This is for new blogs! Go look up Pamela and start a Carnival of the Semi-Rejected!

New Blogger Hint #7: Running ads or Blogbegging when you're blogging on a free service is kinda tacky. I mean, it's not like you're paying for bandwidth charges or anything. At least get your own domain name before you start diluting your product by shilling for someone else.

Grendel's Dragon
Mike at Grendel's Dragon wants to tell you all about Frank Rich's tour de farce. It's hard to say if Mike is fisking the column, or just mocking it. Either way, it's a fun post, and you should go give it a read!

New Blogger Hint #8: To those wishing to increase your traffic, ain't no way quicker than to enter a few carnivals! Check out the automated Carnival submission page courtesy of The Conservative Cat. Don't worry, Blue-Staters, we won't tell your local ACLU chapter you've consorted with the enemy in the name of increasing your hit rate. Gee, taking proactive steps to increase your readership... that's a little like capitalism, isn't it? Better not tell anyone!

That's all of the regular submissions! I thought it was a bit light, so I went looking for a few cool blogs still in their 90 day warranty period. Here's what I found:

Asian Invasion - Misadventures in Hong Kong
Big Trouble In Little China! Read about an expatriate Kiwi in Hong Kong!

my smoky mtn. home
Now, this person has an ENTIRELY different worldview than I do. Odds are if we met in real life, we'd run screaming from each other. Nevertheless, Amy looks like she's got the hang of the blog thing, even this early in the game.

Lauran blogi
Knitting in Finnish. WTF. I thought knitting blogs were an urban legend. Obviously not, and they've infected Finland!
Well, I'd wear the Kittyville hat, anyway.

Mar's Eau du Blog
Blogger Monkey-monomaniac describes this blog a "Just a strange-smelling heap of bloggy goodness". It seems a bit bare now, but I'm almost certain there was more info up earlier. Somehow I learned that he is a Canuck out of Guelph, Ontario.
I've been to Guelph. Believe me, it's just a load of fun to ask a native where you're at, and when they say the name of the town, you whip out your airsickness bag you saved from the plane, and ask if they're going to need it. Usually they start grumbling about "imperialist Yanks" for some reason.

DogBlog tells the tale of a couple of English Setters traveling to a new home, courtesy of Susan, who does Rescues for unwanted dogs. Good job, Susan! Two biscuits for you!

Smoker's Inferno: A Quitter's Journal
Smoker's Inferno: A Quitter's Journal hits really close to home for me. Just reading it made me want to go get a pack of Camels. Good blog, and good luck quitting the death sticks!

OK, that's all for the Baboon Pirates edition of the New Blog Showcase! Next week we turn it over to the capable hands of Beth, The Imperious Leader of My Vast Right Wing Conspiracy.

See you there!