Baboon Pirates

Scribbles and Scrawls from an unrepentant swashbuckling primate.

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Location: Texas, United States

Monday, May 15, 2006


We Commence To Doin' The Happy Dance!

Mondays are not always a Very Bad Thing!

Got a call from the Parental Units following their return from doing the morning mall-walk. It seems there's a new store opening up in Memorial City Mall, and they knew I'd get a kick out of hearing the news.

Now, I've successfully avoided Memorial City Mall for years. If I needed some tools from Sears, or my Dillard's charge card needed some abuse, I'd sneak in those stores via the side doors, get what I needed and leave without ever setting foot in the Mall proper. I've never been much of a mall person, even when I was younger. Just too many teenyboppers ditzing around, and hordes of oldsters taking up 8 lanes of traffic.

Zibig & I used to roam around the now-defunct Town & Country Mall, but we were generally making asses our ourselves, mainly by smoking the doobage in the service access hallways. T&C Mall was supposed to bury Mem. City Mall under a flood of modernity, but a poor location and a crappy layout eventually made it implode. Nowadays, it's a grassy plain interrupted by three intact parking garages and a Needless Markup that became a standalone store.

Aiyyeee! I digress. Back to the tale.

Nowadays, the mere sight of mall-specific shops, like Visible Changes, a Gap, or Brookstone can induce a case of the screaming fan-tods. Malls are just so... (and I HATE using this word, makes me sound like I'm 50 years older than I am...) so.... TACKY! You don't even get the benefit of an Orange Julius or the Corn Dog Shack anymore. Heh. I'm dating myself. Those two shops used to sit side by side in MC Mall for YEARS. I can't count the number of people from my high school that used to work in one or the other. The Corn Dog Shack used to take this humungous chunk of cheddar cheese, swirl it around in the corn dog batter, then deep-fry the sumbitch until it was golden brown. Needless to say, I never ate one. Not that I'm opposed to battered and deep-fried cheese chunks. It's just that I knew that sometimes "taste enhancers" went into the corn dog batter...

OK, I digress yet again!!! Cutting to the chase, we're getting an Apple Store! Friendly, knowledgeable tech support just two miles away! No more schlepping all the way over to the Galleria to visit the Shrine of Computational Superiority!

This is gonna be sweet!!!

(Oh, don't even bother to attempt to explain why your PC/Linux/SPARC/Cray is a better platform. It's a wasted effort. I drank deeply of the Apple Kool-Ade long ago...)