Chained To The Oars
Our Department's Motto: ROW FASTER!!!
My friend Flygirl's zooming into town in the wee hours of the night for a 16 hour+ layover, and I'll be stuck at work all day tomorrow. This makes me rather sad. See, if I was past my one year anniversary, I'd no longer be subject to the "We'll fire you for looking at us cross-ways" clause of the employment contract. I'd actually have to be written up for blowing off work quite a few times before the axe would fall.
In all honesty, I've got a training class that day, and those I can't blow off. I've got to go cast pearls before swine, lest they do something egregious that causes nasty spendy lawsuits. You'd be amazed at the terminal ignorance of some of these managerial types. Here's a few quotes direct from the classes:
"What's wrong with writing 'Nice Legs!' on someone's interview form & application??"
"Teamwork is everyone doing what I tell them to do!"
"Well, you know how much the Irish drink. You'd be a fool to promote them."
Yup, actual quotes from the guv'mint people in charge of some aspect of your life. And to think about all the citizens that assume the government knows what's best for them! Silly rabbits...
Teaching employment law classes is actually fun, in a way. The phrase "Peeling back the Foreskin of Ignorance and applying the Wire Brush of Enlightenment" seems particularly apropos.
Still, I'd much rather go hang out with Flygirl. We see each other all too rarely. It's a long way from our college days, when we were joined at the hip most afternoons. Not that we had a dating relationship, mind you, it was just all the long afternoons at the local La Madeleine scarfing down the free fresh-baked bread with butter and raspberry jam or orange marmalade after buying a single glass of iced tea or cup of coffee. Well... all that jam gets sticky, and add a tiny little VW ragtop to the mix, and the song "Stuck In The Middle With You" took on a certain relevance.
I kid! I jest! She really prefers duct tape or masking tape for sticking purposes, to judge by the flood of puns rolling out of her dispenser. Now I'll layer off the tape puns lest she adhere to a schedule of retaliation that won't wrap until 3aM.
Well, maybe next time things'll work out. Gripe we may, but work we must!
My friend Flygirl's zooming into town in the wee hours of the night for a 16 hour+ layover, and I'll be stuck at work all day tomorrow. This makes me rather sad. See, if I was past my one year anniversary, I'd no longer be subject to the "We'll fire you for looking at us cross-ways" clause of the employment contract. I'd actually have to be written up for blowing off work quite a few times before the axe would fall.
In all honesty, I've got a training class that day, and those I can't blow off. I've got to go cast pearls before swine, lest they do something egregious that causes nasty spendy lawsuits. You'd be amazed at the terminal ignorance of some of these managerial types. Here's a few quotes direct from the classes:
"What's wrong with writing 'Nice Legs!' on someone's interview form & application??"
"Teamwork is everyone doing what I tell them to do!"
"Well, you know how much the Irish drink. You'd be a fool to promote them."
Yup, actual quotes from the guv'mint people in charge of some aspect of your life. And to think about all the citizens that assume the government knows what's best for them! Silly rabbits...
Teaching employment law classes is actually fun, in a way. The phrase "Peeling back the Foreskin of Ignorance and applying the Wire Brush of Enlightenment" seems particularly apropos.
Still, I'd much rather go hang out with Flygirl. We see each other all too rarely. It's a long way from our college days, when we were joined at the hip most afternoons. Not that we had a dating relationship, mind you, it was just all the long afternoons at the local La Madeleine scarfing down the free fresh-baked bread with butter and raspberry jam or orange marmalade after buying a single glass of iced tea or cup of coffee. Well... all that jam gets sticky, and add a tiny little VW ragtop to the mix, and the song "Stuck In The Middle With You" took on a certain relevance.
I kid! I jest! She really prefers duct tape or masking tape for sticking purposes, to judge by the flood of puns rolling out of her dispenser. Now I'll layer off the tape puns lest she adhere to a schedule of retaliation that won't wrap until 3aM.
Well, maybe next time things'll work out. Gripe we may, but work we must!
posted by El Capitan | 11:23 AM
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