Baboon Pirates

Scribbles and Scrawls from an unrepentant swashbuckling primate.

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Location: Texas, United States

Monday, January 30, 2006

I Double-Dog Dare You!

Bow Down Before The Cheese That Cannot Die!

I saw this recipe while perusing an extremely frightening website consisting mostly of advertisements of small children leering demonically at food. The kind of website Lileks might do, if he gets a bad pepperoni slice at Chuck E. Rat's Pizza and followed it up with a fistful of peyote buttons.

Anyway, the website was disturbing enough, but upon reading this recipe, I needed to make a -8 saving throw vs. Losing Sanity. I have no idea where my old gaming dice are, however, so basically I'm phuct and consequently gibbering like a loon right now.

Come risk *YOUR* sanity (and your intestines, and your colon, and your general well-being) and create this masterpiece of culinary artistry: (For me to poop on!!)

'Golden Glory'


4 hard-cooked eggs
1 8-ounce pkg. elbow macaroni
1 lb. pkg. Kraft Velveeta Cheese "Food"
4 tbsp. mayonnaise
1/2 cup milk
4 ripe tomatoes
salt & pepper to taste

Cut four hard-cooked eggs lengthwise. Remove and mash yolks with 4 tbsp Kraft Mayonnaise. Season with salt and pepper and fill the whites.

Cook one 8-ounce package elbow macaroni in boiling salted water until tender. Drain and place in shallow casserole.

Now for the Velveeta magic! In the top of a double boiler, melt one pound of the famous cheese food. Into the melted golden Velveeta gradually stir one-half cup milk. Combine half of that gloriously rich, smooth Velveeta sauce with the macaroni.
Arrange the stuffed eggs on top and pour the remaining Velveeta sauce on the eggs. Bake 20 minutes in a 350 degree F oven. Place casserole on a chop plate, surround with broiled tomato halves, and treat your folks to "Golden Glory"!

Ed. notes:

Baked Mayonnaise??? EEEWWWWWWW!!!!
Eggs and macaroni? EEEWWWWWWW!!!
Broiled 'maters? Eww... well, that's OK, I suppose.
WTF is a "chop plate"?