Baboon Pirates

Scribbles and Scrawls from an unrepentant swashbuckling primate.

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Location: Texas, United States

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

E. Gary Gygax Dead At 69

Failed His Saving Throw Vs. Grim Reaper's Scythe...

The man largely responsible for the nerdification of millions of America's pudgy, acne-riddled youth has died today in Lake Geneva, WI.

Gygax, the creator of the role-playing game Dungeons and Dragons was an avid player of tabletop wargames, but felt it was his duty to create a game that would lead to impressionable youth selling their souls to Satan as they dabbled in the occult.

Gygax was a co-founder of TSR Games, which at its peak profited over a million dollars a year, largely in grubby dollar bills and jars of coins collected via the paper routes and pizza delivery jobs of TSR customers.

Old-school gamers across the country are weeping over their copies of the Player's Handbook and Dungeon Master's Guide, and fondling their dice bags like a rosary chain. Those blessed with a 1st Edition copy of Deities and Demigods are reading through the Cthulhu Mythos section, trying to decide what Elder Being to sacrifice their firstborn to in order to have Gygax's soul remain here on Earth.

In lieu of flowers, the Gygax family asks that donations be sent to youth fitness programs, dating services for Asperger's Syndrome sufferers, and the Clearasil Research Center.


--- All kidding aside, I was a huge fan of D&D when I was in Jr. High & High School, and for quite a few years afterward. Every now and then, I debate having one last grand adventure with my old D&D crew, most of whom are still here in town,. Alas, kids, jobs and the travails of adult life seem to keep us from the dank & orc-ridden dungeons.