Kids Today...

They Don't Make Delinquents Like They Used To.

My neighbor across the street got his house wrapped. No doubt the culprits were a bunch of horny high school admirers of his teenage daughter, or perhaps a giggle of bitchy little teen girls who don't like her.

Either way, they're rank amateurs. Not the first clue as to how to properly wrap a house. Looks like they used a 4-pack at most. Bah... That's what I'd use on just the shrubbery.

We'd roll in (no pun intended) in 3-4 cars, each person armed with an 8-pack of quality TP. The cheap stuff just doesn't do the job. The cars would coast to a stop, everyone would hop out and commence to flinging rolls. The strongest arms would boost 'em high up into the trees, and repeat until there wasn't a speck of green visible.

No laughing, no noise, just throw, throw, throw until you were out of paper. Usually the girls would go after the cars with white shoe polish on the windows while the guys were wrapping. 5 minutes, tops, and the place looked like ass-paper spiders had cocooned the joint...

Hmmmph. What do they teach kids in schools these days??

I weep for the future...