Nappus Interruptus

'Cause I'm Apparently Not Worthy Of Sleep

It's something of a joke (albeit a slightly bitter one) between my close friends and I that it's virtually certain they will choose to phone me at the very moment I'm starting on a meal, or have just dropped off to sleep. So often does this occur that it's actually helped improve my manners. See, it's bad form to curse someone roundly simply for calling, so I just learn to reheat the meals and get by on less sleep. Such is the price of friendship.

Days like today are a puzzlement, though. Neither RockHauler or Zibig have phoned, which means they are either working or otherwise occupied. After a stirring morning blasting nasty bad guys online with Zippo playing Ghost Recon, I felt the urge for a couple of hours reading and napping. After all, Sunday is a day for rest! (Sorry you have to work, Serena!)

So I'm in the middle of this bizarre dream where I'm sitting around a large dinner table with perhaps 20 people and we're passing around a live steer so everyone can have a try at bulldogging the poor beast. (Note: never eat egg salad & chicken, spinach & feta sausages before sleeping, you'll dream you some tremulous dreams!) Suddenly, the doorbell starts ringing. I actually dream it's the doorbell ringing, and in the dream, look out the window and see my parents outside, packed for a trip. Odd. What's even odder is that the ringing won't stop.

Only one person is ornery enough to keep her thumb on the doorbell button that long, and that's Mom. She's heartless (and rather thoughtless) in these matters. If I'm asleep when she phones, she will not leave a message on the machine. She'll hang up, then call again and again until I finally answer it. Then she has the gall to wonder why I'm upset. Once, when I refused to answer the phone and actually unplugged the contraption, she called one of the neighbors, and had them come pound on my window to wake me up. We had a few choice words over that one.

So, by the time I'm fully awake and aware that the doorbell is really ringing, I'm assuming Mom has forgotten or lost her key to this house, and wants in. No messages showing on cell phone or land-line. Damn it all to hell. I pull on my bathrobe and set forth to do battle.

Except the doorstep is empty. The doorbell, however, continues ringing. Bloody hell.

Something is incredibly wonky with the doorbell. There's a circuit crossed somewhere, or squirrels have gotten up in the attic and chewed on the wires. I finally had to yank power to the ring unit to get it to stop.

So, if you drop by, knock loudly. With any luck, I'll be asleep.