Tell Me Again Why I Must Worship The Police?
Sometimes, The 'Menace 2 Society' Wears Blue
Via Ravenwood's Universe, we learn of yet another example of extreme asshattery perpetrated by the Boys In Blue. It seems that after repeatedly ignoring officer's warnings to exit the San Marcos river, 42 year old Dave Newman was arrested after reaching the shore.
Dave Newman, howver, was busy in the water SAVING SOMEONE FROM DROWNING AT THE TIME!!!!! GAAAAHHHH!!!!!
FUCKING ASSHATTED COPS!!!!! GRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!
In all fairness, this is not a cop issue. Not 100% anyway. This has more to do with the particular flavor of the cop involved.
The arresting officers were members of that celebrated law enforcement organization, the Texas State University Police Department. Prior to the recent namechange, they were more obvious as a yokel cow-college when they were known as Southwest Texas State U.
I've had a long history of running battles with campus cops. Due to their usual fuckwittery and general cluelessness, I've always emerged triumphant.
At Stephen F. Austin State U., the campus PD tried to roust me on a bullshit charge of stealing manhole covers and cop car hubcaps as part of a scavenger hunt. While I was guilty as sin of removing a toilet seat from the local Mickey D's (and ordering a Big Mac, also on the scavenger hunt list, with the seat jammed under my jacket as I stood in line), I never came near a manhole cover or hubcap that night. Their method of investigation was to shut me in a room while various officers came in and out and screamed about my impending expulsion and imminent jail time. I finally had enough after about an hour, and threatened to lawyer up if they didn't charge me or release me. They had jack squat for evidence... I knew it, THEY knew it, so finally they let me walk "with a warning". Yeah, whatever, Deppity Dawg. I've still got that toilet seat, now that I think about it...
When I was hanging out with friends who attended Rice U., the "Campos" were a constant looming presence. Many times as we staggered back to Hanszen dorm from Valhalla or Willy's pub, we'd be tailed by cops, who would wait until we were within 20 yards of the dorm before rousting us for an ID check. They seemed to take great delight in shining Maglights in our eyes and grouching about public intoxication.
At my stint at the University of Texas at Arlington, I finally twigged to what was causing these doofuses in blue to act as they did. It was nothing more than sheer boredom. See, the Campus PD Chief (and I use the word "chief" in the most sarcastic way possible) would engage in empire-building, and constantly expand their department whenever he/she could. They would justify the amount of cops they hired by saying "We're the same size as a town of 24,000 people!" Yeah, and after 6 pm, you're back down to 800 people, dumbass. This was a commuter college, despite the protestations to the contrary.
So, you had too many cops just sitting around looking for something to do every shift. After giving out tickets on Cooper st. got boring, they'd go drive up and down Frat Row scoping out Tri-Delts. Then, it was nap time behind the stadium. After that, it was rousting the freaky-lookin' long hairs playing frisbee golf, and so on all night.
The level of harassment got so bad that I started working up an appropriations bill in Student Congress to supply all the Campus cops with a GameBoy, so they'd quit bothering everybody. It never cleared committee, but it should've.
For the record, campus cops ARE certified peace officers. They have the same powers of arrest as any other cop. There's 2 big differences, though. The first is, to be hired for a Campus PD, it pretty much means you couldn't find a real PD that would hire you. While I don't doubt there are exceptions, for the most part every Campus polizei I've met is either not old enough to shave, or too incompetent (or too much of a loose cannon) for a real city PD.
The second difference between a Campus Cop and a real cop is (and I don't think the laws have changed since I graduated) that the authority of a Campus Cop ends at the county border where their university is situated. UT system cops can practice policing in any county that there's a UT campus. Texas State U. cops can't even give you a littering ticket if you're across the Hays County line.
If you're a campus cop reading this, and you're currently frothing at the mouth, good! For the most part, you're redundant, most likely incompetent, and could easily be replaced by a $7/hr rent-a-cop with no one noticing the difference.
Via Ravenwood's Universe, we learn of yet another example of extreme asshattery perpetrated by the Boys In Blue. It seems that after repeatedly ignoring officer's warnings to exit the San Marcos river, 42 year old Dave Newman was arrested after reaching the shore.
Dave Newman, howver, was busy in the water SAVING SOMEONE FROM DROWNING AT THE TIME!!!!! GAAAAHHHH!!!!!
FUCKING ASSHATTED COPS!!!!! GRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!
In all fairness, this is not a cop issue. Not 100% anyway. This has more to do with the particular flavor of the cop involved.
The arresting officers were members of that celebrated law enforcement organization, the Texas State University Police Department. Prior to the recent namechange, they were more obvious as a yokel cow-college when they were known as Southwest Texas State U.
I've had a long history of running battles with campus cops. Due to their usual fuckwittery and general cluelessness, I've always emerged triumphant.
At Stephen F. Austin State U., the campus PD tried to roust me on a bullshit charge of stealing manhole covers and cop car hubcaps as part of a scavenger hunt. While I was guilty as sin of removing a toilet seat from the local Mickey D's (and ordering a Big Mac, also on the scavenger hunt list, with the seat jammed under my jacket as I stood in line), I never came near a manhole cover or hubcap that night. Their method of investigation was to shut me in a room while various officers came in and out and screamed about my impending expulsion and imminent jail time. I finally had enough after about an hour, and threatened to lawyer up if they didn't charge me or release me. They had jack squat for evidence... I knew it, THEY knew it, so finally they let me walk "with a warning". Yeah, whatever, Deppity Dawg. I've still got that toilet seat, now that I think about it...
When I was hanging out with friends who attended Rice U., the "Campos" were a constant looming presence. Many times as we staggered back to Hanszen dorm from Valhalla or Willy's pub, we'd be tailed by cops, who would wait until we were within 20 yards of the dorm before rousting us for an ID check. They seemed to take great delight in shining Maglights in our eyes and grouching about public intoxication.
At my stint at the University of Texas at Arlington, I finally twigged to what was causing these doofuses in blue to act as they did. It was nothing more than sheer boredom. See, the Campus PD Chief (and I use the word "chief" in the most sarcastic way possible) would engage in empire-building, and constantly expand their department whenever he/she could. They would justify the amount of cops they hired by saying "We're the same size as a town of 24,000 people!" Yeah, and after 6 pm, you're back down to 800 people, dumbass. This was a commuter college, despite the protestations to the contrary.
So, you had too many cops just sitting around looking for something to do every shift. After giving out tickets on Cooper st. got boring, they'd go drive up and down Frat Row scoping out Tri-Delts. Then, it was nap time behind the stadium. After that, it was rousting the freaky-lookin' long hairs playing frisbee golf, and so on all night.
The level of harassment got so bad that I started working up an appropriations bill in Student Congress to supply all the Campus cops with a GameBoy, so they'd quit bothering everybody. It never cleared committee, but it should've.
For the record, campus cops ARE certified peace officers. They have the same powers of arrest as any other cop. There's 2 big differences, though. The first is, to be hired for a Campus PD, it pretty much means you couldn't find a real PD that would hire you. While I don't doubt there are exceptions, for the most part every Campus polizei I've met is either not old enough to shave, or too incompetent (or too much of a loose cannon) for a real city PD.
The second difference between a Campus Cop and a real cop is (and I don't think the laws have changed since I graduated) that the authority of a Campus Cop ends at the county border where their university is situated. UT system cops can practice policing in any county that there's a UT campus. Texas State U. cops can't even give you a littering ticket if you're across the Hays County line.
If you're a campus cop reading this, and you're currently frothing at the mouth, good! For the most part, you're redundant, most likely incompetent, and could easily be replaced by a $7/hr rent-a-cop with no one noticing the difference.
posted by El Capitan | 1:49 PM
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