Message To The Hair Fairies

No, Not The Poofters Over At SuperCuts...

Look here, you miserable gnat-sized terrors!

I know your cousin the Tooth Fairy has given you leave to prey on us older types 'cause we no longer swap teeth for coinage. You show up in the middle of the night every so often and give us severe cases of bedhead, and sometimes weave these awful little knots that won't comb out.

All I'm askin' is that if ya gotta make these knots in my hair that force me to yank out hair by the roots to get 'em out, PLEASE do it lower down, where I've got plenty of hair left?

Sigh...