Baboon Pirates

Scribbles and Scrawls from an unrepentant swashbuckling primate.

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Location: Texas, United States

Thursday, March 29, 2007

@$$holes On Parade

Egregious Examples Of Asshattery

1) James Dobson: Dobson, the self-appointed guardian of our collective morality, and leader of the evangelical group Focus On The Family, said in a phone interview that he didn't think that GOP Presidential-Maybe Fred Thompson was a Christian, despite Thompson's baptism into the Church of Christ. Dobson also strongly supports Newt Gingrinch.

Hmmm. Now, I'm not drinking the Thompson KoolAid just yet. I don't want his campaign to be a right-wing version of Barack Obama's "Something Out Of Nothing" media circus. Still, it seems pretty presumptuous for Dobson to arbitrarily determine who's Christian enough or not. I'm not even going to mention Gingrich's numerous personal and professional fuckups that somehow are OK with Dobson.

Yo, Jamie. Go read the Gospel of Matthew, Chapter 7, Verse 1. Asshole.


2) Garrett William Mallot: This shitheel got accidentally bumped into by another man as he tried to exit a METRO bus here in Houston. They argued about it, and Genius Boy pulled out his legally concealed handgun, and shot the other man dead in front of horrified onlookers.

Nice work, dumbass. You just gave the gun-grabbers some of their preferred ammunition and made all legal (and levelheaded) handgun carriers look bad.

I hope they fry you for this, dirtbag, but not until you're someone's "wife" in a jail cell for a few years.


3) Mahmoud Ahmadinejad: Dude, the SAS are gonna sneak into Tehran and cut off your nutsack. Let the Brit sailors go!


4) Robert Mugabe: Congratulations, Robbie baby! You've almost singlehandedly destroyed an entire country. The jewel of southern Africa is now a festering cesspool.

Will you please go ahead and die, already? You're about 748 years old. How many gallons of virgin's blood a day do you ingest to stay alive? Oh, and shave off the f#(%!*& Hitler mustache.

All the other South African leaders that are supporting you at this summit meeting? They're assholes too.

Sorry, just had to vent today...

Update: Ambulance Driver picked up #5 for the @$$hole list. Go check it out. A more fetid balloon-knot of cankered sphincter would be hard to find.