Baboon Pirates

Scribbles and Scrawls from an unrepentant swashbuckling primate.

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Location: Texas, United States

Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Pigs & Parrots & Poker, Oh My!

A Dayful Of Fun! A Nightful Of Driving!

When we last left our intrepid blogger, he was getting ready to head to New Braunfels for a bodacious pig roast, so we'll continue the story there...

I packed a cooler full of Gin & Tonic supplies, plus a few Coke Zeros and some bottled water. I planned on getting righteously squiffy once I arrived at the pig roast. I threw in my favorite lime-cutting knife, which made an appearance later at the party. To show you where my head was at, I'd bought RealLime juice for the G&T's and didn't even have any limes to cut...

With everything packed and by the front door the night before, including the basket o' gifties, I went to get some much-needed sleep.

(OK, everyone in unison...)

Ha. As If.

Nope, the congestion and coughing meant I was up most of the night. I needed to be leaving the driveway at 7 am to make it to the pig roast by 11 am, in order to help molest the pig before it got thrown on the fire.

At 8 am, I'm wrapped in a towel post-shower, and sitting blearily on the edge of the bed, debating trying to go back to sleep.

Desire to attend the shindig won out, and I was speeding down the highway by 8:30.

By 9:30, I was wandering from lane to lane on I-10, trying to stay awake. I pulled into the next truck stop for a nap. Rain on the roof woke me up sometime later, so I fired up the V8 and eased on down the road.

Between Columbus and Flatonia was a deluge of biblical proportions. Every overpass on that stretch of road was crowded with moist motorcyclists trying to get out of the downpour.

I made it into New Braunfels with no further issues, and was guided in via cell phone to the Casa Del Christina y Dash.

Zonker and Dash met me outside, and helped to haul in the gear. I'd brought a large assortment of jams and preserves to help wean Christina off her Mayhaw jelly habit, but as luck would have it, the wicker basket fell apart on the way inside, so instead of a charming basket o' jars, she got a tangle o' plastic bags. That's my luck as usual...

Such is the hospitality of Christina & Dash that I'm literally having hot bacon-wrapped dove breasts and fried wontons handed to me as restorative measures as I collapse in a chair!

Note to other attendees... I'm usually a bit sharper of wit and quicker to react than I was on Saturday. No sleep the past two nights, a headful of glop and a brainpan full of decongestants had me moving at half-speed, not to mention the post-nasal drip induced coughing jags. So, sorry if I seemed a bit dead to the world! I really wasn't drunk! I ended up not drinking at all this trip, more's the pity!

The rest of the day was a whirlwind of new faces, names and and endless supply of food and drink and conversation. The offspring of Christina & Dash were present, and aside from Sweet One cleaning me out at poker again, they were a pleasure to be around. Despite my bribe of a stuffed parrot, I was unable to unseat "Mr. Goat" as Wee One's favorite guest, but I have planted the seeds of piracy, and that will more than suffice!

OK, the food in detail...

The guest of honor... Mr. Peter Porker. Dash did an excellent job putting the burn on the swine. It was a 55+ lb pig, and it took about 5 hours on the smoker to get him all tender and tasty. Dash brought in the hams first, and they were just falling apart. The tenderloin was absolutely amazing, just as tender as it could be.

I tried some of Sam & Barbie's North Carolina BBQ sauce, and I have to say it was pretty damned good. That vinegar/hot pepper tang takes some getting used to, but I could see myself enjoying it again! Now I just need to convince them to quit putting slaw on their BBQ sammiches!

The bacon-wrapped dove breasts with jalapeno and cream cheese and the fried wontons I'd had before, they were delicious as always! The baked beans were great! I'm not usually a bean person, but Christina motioned towards the pot with her patented "Try it, you'll like it" gesture, and she was correct! They were full of ground meat and bacon, and you were tempted to plant your face in the pot and go bobbing for bacon!

The 'tater salad was full of goodies, there was Gooey Cake and Chocolate cake, and Kahlua cake, and fruit tarts and bowls of fruit and croissants and a spicy corn dip, and best of all, the Shrimp Crack.

I don't know what went into the Shrimp Crack. All I know is that there's shrimp and cheese, and when spread on a Ritz cracker, you'll sell your firstborn for another helping! It's that addictive (hence, the Crack name...)

I met lots of new faces this trip! Sam, Zonker, Oddybobo and Christina's non-blogging friend Susan I'd met on earlier trips. New this time around was Sam's wife Barbie, who's just a hoot to hang out with!

I was very glad to have a chance to sit down with Sam & Zonker and shoot the breeze. One of the drawbacks of a blogmeet is that since there's so many people there, and so many simultaneous conversations, that there's always someone you don't get to visit with very much. I hadn't had my quota of face time with those two at the last meet-ups!

The other folks I met were all just as nice as could be, and I wish I had another day in order to chat with everyone in detail...

There was Michele and her hubby Kevin, Richmond from way up in Wisconsin, Laura the Trooper's Gal (who I could swear I've met before...) and her very own Trooper. There was also Miss Lolly from Tyler, whose voice sounds so much like my Aunt Carolyn's that I caught myself doing a double take across the poker table! There was also a couple from north of Austin that were friends of Barbie, and were a most pleasant pair to chat with.

Things wrapped up for me sometime near 2 am, and I reluctantly took my leave in order to run 20 miles up the road to my sister's place where a couch awaited.

Or so I thought...

I'm pretty sure I got the date right on my "room reservation", in spite of my NyQuil-induced fog, but when I arrived at my sister's place, ain't no one there! No Sis, BIL, nephew, Mom, Dad, not even the dogs. Damndamndamn...

They'd all departed for Houston that afternoon, I learned later. So, in a fit of anger-fueled wakefulness, I started for home. Hell, it's only 3 hours from Kyle, TX, I figured...

It took several 10-15 minute nap-stops in Luling, Waelder, Schulenberg, the rest stop outside Columbus and the picnic stop outside Brookshire for me to make it home! I'd pull off the interstate when the road got fuzzy, nap until the truck cab got hot & stuffy, then go for another stretch of road. I got home just after 8 am, just in time for a quick nap before the Indy 500 on Sunday!

Now, I can't recommend that you stay awake 64 out of 72 hours just to attend a pig roast, but it worked for me...

I had a great time, and can't wait for the next one! I think I'm gonna send Dash & Christina a piglet, and by the time it gets big enough to eat, we'll be ready to do this again!