Baboon Pirates

Scribbles and Scrawls from an unrepentant swashbuckling primate.

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Location: Texas, United States

Tuesday, August 07, 2012

The Paperless Office?

To Dreeeeam The Impossible Dreeaaaammmm!!

Heh. Not in my lifetime...

There's something insidious about bureaucratic inertia that absolutely stifles any attempt at modernization. I'd love to see the tons & tons of paper reduced around the office, but even with relatively up-to-date electronic filing procedures and policies, the physical sheet of paper remains supreme.

What kills me is that in just about every case, that piece of paper is taken by some admin flunky in some department, and transcribed into a database or spreadsheet. So, a new employee, for example, fills out a huge wad of forms, turns them into the local admin, who spends hours entering the data AGAIN, then files the paperwork. This packet then remains, well, forever, as far as I can tell.

How hard would it be to just cut out the middleman and go from source to database, and bypass the paper altogether?

F'rinstance, here's the list of paper documents that you need before you start to work for The Man. Multiply this times 2000 new hires a year:

MAC form (Move, Add, Change - Nothing goes anywhere without one of these...)
Employment application
Personnel Request Form
Verifications Form
Drug Testing/Processing Log
Pre-Employment Medical Assessment (not for every position)
Drug Test & Consent Form
Fingerprint Form
E-Verify form
Copies of 2 forms of ID
I-9 form
W-4 form
Direct Deposit form
Disclosure form
Acknowledgement of Receipt form
Emergency Contact form
Texas New Hire Reporting form
Report To Work slip
Medical/Dental Election form
Voluntary Life Insurance form
Basic Life Insurance form
AFLAC election forms
Dependent Care Reimbursement form
Flex Spending Account form
ID Badge application
Parking Authorization form
METRO or Parking Access Card form
Signature Authorization form
Network Security Clearance Access Request form
Email Use Policy agreement
Objects On Loan form

And, I'm sure I missed a couple. Usually, it takes an 8 hour day to process through a new employee, assuming there's no hold-ups or glitches.

Sigh. Guess I ought to invest some money with Weyerhauser, Kimberly-Clark or Georgia Pacific. Looks like paper's here for the foreseeable future!