Baboon Pirates

Scribbles and Scrawls from an unrepentant swashbuckling primate.

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Location: Texas, United States

Tuesday, October 01, 2013

When Did They Shrink Electricity??

I'm Constantly Hornswoggled By New Technology...

I had a bit of a snag on the way into work yesterday.  Got into the truck, turned the key and got nothing but a clickclickclickclick from under the hood.

Damn.  Flat batt'ry.

The last time this happened, I was halfway across town.  Much more convenient to have AAA come to your house, I must say.  A quick jumpstart and a trip to the AutoZone to swap out the big ol' Duracell, and I was back on the road inside of 90 minutes without spending one thin dime.

AAA has changed, however.  The last two times I've had to use them, they sent out the usual slightly seedy character in a wrecker.  One of those times, I'm fairly certain the wrecker driver was tweaking hard on some sort of upper.

This time, I got not a wrecker but a Toyota Prius decked out in AAA livery, driven by a woman.  Nothing wrong with that, just kinda surprised me, is all.

She agreed with the flat battery hypothesis, hooking up this tester gizmo that looked like one of those UPS package-tracker computers with cables running out of it.  She attached the battery clamps, and then had another thingamajig that encircled the positive cable, and the tester gizmo spat out a paper readout of the battery voltage, amperage, and graphs of the starter cycle and load test. 

"OK", says she.  "Let's see if we can't jumpstart this thing."

I'm agreeable with that idea.  So, I'm looking for her to drag some jumper cables and pop the hood on the Prius, or at least go get the battery cart out of the back.

She just stands there looking at me like I'm kinda slow.  Which I may just be...  "Go ahead and crank it over."

I turn the key, and there's the clickclickclickclick again.    She joggles something and yells to crank it again.


Holy shit.  Where'd the power come from??

Somehow, they packed enough of a battery in that tester gizmo to turn over a 5.4 liter V8 engine.

So how come my cell phone battery goes flat so damn quickly???

Anyway, pay for AAA and for the extended battery warranty.  It's worth it...